Hall of Fame of Life

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Well, it's been quite a long time since I've looked at these, but finally I can get them up on a website for the world to see.... These people are the internationally recognized Hall of Famers of Life... That is, they are the best 50 people at life that we could think of. After much debate, here they are. My pal Dan Auger, AKA "Augie" wrote an article a couple years ago taht didn't quite make it to the papers. This one's for you, Augie!

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HALL OF FAME OF LIFE OFFERS RETURN TO NORMALCY

by Dan Auger

 

 

After September 11th, the country became embroiled in a war against terrorism, entangled in an economic recession, and grew a phobia towards white powder.  The world was indeed a frightening place to live in. However, a small group of students at Foran High School grew tired of living in fear and decided to take action.  Thinking back to happier days the students remembered their past and current favorite people, and the joyous memories these athletes, singers, actors, and regular people brought them.  Thus was the beginning of the formation of the Hall of Fame of Life.  The Hall started out between yours truly, Paul Gulyas, and Steve Polaski as a small way of honoring those who touched our lives in a positive way.  The candidate list became longer and longer and soon a committee was set up to debate which candidates made the list and which werent worthy.  The ten member committee created a list of candidates, voted on election, and debated the list down to fifty members.  All the members have touched our lives in a positive way and have truly excelled at life.  They have uplifted our spirits and brought us joy in this unprecedented time of grief and sorrow.  We are proud to present the Hall of Fame of Life of 2001-2002 as a dedication to the relentlessness of the American spirit.  And remember, if you cant appreciate the Hall of Fame of Life, then the terrorists win.

1.Balki (from Perfect Strangers):  Balki truly embodies the spirit of the American       dream.  He came over from a small foreign country and struggled, yet survived with the   help of his, Cousin Larry.

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2.Mr. Belvedere: A lonely butler who always strove to bring happiness to others despite his own sad state.

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3.Brooklyn Brawler: He was constantly beaten on and pummeled by opponents yet always got up and tried again, despite his horrendous wrestling skills.

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4.Steve Buscemi: Hes one scary guy.  Just look at his bugged-out eyes.

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5.Ray Charles:  The guy is blind, yet went on to become one of the most successful musicians of all-time.  No one can touch his performance of, America the Beautiful.

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6.Jesus Christ:  He was the Son of God, was crucified, died on the cross, and rose from the dead so that we could go to Heaven. Hall of Fame of Life? Yes.

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7.Chunk (from Goonies): Just look at this kid. He deserves a break.

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8.Sean Connery: The ultimate Bond? Perhaps so.  We also have a substitute teacher who looks like him.

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9.Joe Cool:  Not only can the man contact supernatural forces, he awoke from a coma and gave a thumbs up to the camera.

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Not the real Joe Cool, but I guess he's some sort of substitute for him. Anyway....
 
10.Howard Cossell:  The man tells it like it is.  He is Mr. Monday Night Football.

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11.Rodney Dangerfield:  Gotta love Ladybugs.  One of the funniest guys out there.

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12Tony Danza:  The epitome of cool in the 1980s.  Whos the Boss? You are Mr. Danza my friend, you are.

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13Super Dave:  Crazy stuntman who starred on USA Network for about two months.  Had some classic episodes though.

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14Robert DeNiro:Taxi Driver, numerous mob movies, and to top it off, Meet the Parents.  The Hollywood Renaissance man.

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15.Neil Diamond:  Constantly looks and sounds intoxicated yet is able to put out classics like Forever in Blue Jeans, Sweet Caroline, and Cracklin Rose.

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16.Bob Dole:  The man ran for President nearly every year and lost, fell off a podium while speaking and crashed into the crowd, starred in Viagra commercials, and gets to hang with Britney Spears.  What else do you want out of the man?

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17.Michael Douglass:  Sure hes starred in great movies like, The American President but the real reason he was voted in?  His mullet in, Disclosure is a thing of beauty.

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18.Mr. Jeynes:  As The Fonz is the standard for suaveness, Mr. Jeynes is the standard for one-liners such as, The Easter Bunny is the Communists way of degrading Easter.  A great, great man.

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19.Evil Knievel:  The ultimate stuntman.  Nearly died every time he performed just so he could entertain us.

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20.The Fonz:  The standard for suaveness, The Fonz is still looked up to today by every American.

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CREEPY McCREEP! HOW DID YOU GET IN THE HALL OF FAME OF LIFE!!!
 
Creepy McCreep: I'm sorry, Paul......... I just wanted to peek at what you were doing and watch you from afar because IIII'''MMMMMMM CCRREEEEPPPPPYYYY
 
GET THE FUCK OUT OF HERE! YOU'RE NO ARTHUR FONZARELLI!
 
AAAANNNYYWWAYYY......

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21.Ernest: Hey Verne! Ernest was the epitome of comic genius.

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22.Mr. Keo:  Also known for his one-liners is the substitute teacher Mr. Keo.  Just ask Paul for our list of, Keo Quotes.

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Ok, Mr. Keo would not allow me to put his picture on this page... Instead, he requested that just this mysterious picture be placed beneath his name. He said that deep down inside of us, we all know exactly what it means.
 
23.Don King:  Just look at the hair---Only in America!

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24.Bobby Knight:  The great coach at Indiana and Texas Tech, Bobby Knight is known for throwing a chair across the court, kicking his son on the bench, and his boisterous speeches.  Check out the website, The Dark Side of Bobby Knight for more on this American icon.

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25.Christopher Lloyd:  Crazy and kooky guy from, Back to the Future.

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26.Leslie Nielsen:  The ultimate in crazy and kooky, Leslie Nielsen starred in the Naked Gun trilogy and also Wrongfully Accused.  Dont call me Shirley was a catch line.

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27.Conan OBrian:  Putting it down for the Irish. 

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28.Joe Pesci:  Great mob actor and comic.  Great SNL skits and part in, 8 Heads in a Duffle bag.

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29.Reverend Phelps:  Dont have to agree with his radical views but you gotta respect the man.  Well.no you really dont.  And you probably shouldnt.

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30.Coach Pingatori:  Is this man Bobby Knight in disguise? No but hes close and he goes crazy in, Hoop Dreams.

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31.Vincent Price: One of the scariest men ever to live, Price is the ultimate horror actor of his era.  Who would ever be this mans friend?

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32.Ronald Reagan:  Although Mr. B. may have a personal vendetta against him, The Gipper was one of the greatest presidents ever and helped bring down the Evil Empire.

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33.Geraldo Rivera:  Saving our lives everyday, Geraldo travels around the globe to root out terrorists.  Hes been to Afghanistan, Somalia, Lebanon, and several other hot spots.  A true American hero.

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34.Al Roker:  Perhaps the nicest guy on TV, Al keeps it real with the people and cares about getting his weather right.

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35.Mr. Walt Rollins: History of Crime and Violence.is this really a class??

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36.Teddy Roosevelt:  The man was shot and didnt know it.  Refused to get medical attention so he could complete his speech.

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37.Colonel Sanders:  The KFC man, he was also an army herowasnt he?

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Sorry, my bad, that was a pic of Ho Chi Minh.... Were they brothers?

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38.Warren Sapp:  Crazy D-Lineman who harasses the QB and mysteriously appears in rap music videos.

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39."Macho Man Randy Savage:  Oh yeahhhhhhhhhhhh!!

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40.William Shatner:  Priceline.com ads were priceless.

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41.Frank Sinatra:  Old Blue Eyes could settle an argument with his voice or, more likely and often, with his fists.

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42.Bruce Springsteen:  The foremost singer-songwriter of all-time.  A real American hero for the ordinary folk.

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43.John Stossel:  Gets to the bottom of the story and asks the tough questions.  Brings fairness to the media and wont accept a bogus answer.

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44.Mr. T:  Everyones childhood hero made a huge comeback with his appearance on Conan and his cartoon portrayal on SNL.  Eat your greens!!

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45:Strom Thurmond:  The man ran for President in 1948 and was still serving in the Senate at age 99.

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46.Mark Twain:  He made up fake names for people he didnt know.  Was also the finest writer in American history.

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47.Christopher Walken:  The best villain in the movies can also dance.

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48.John Wayne:  The Duke can ride with the best of em.

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49.Barry White:  Uh huh baby.  This love king from the 70s is gonna make ya love him, just a little bit more. May he Rest In Peace.

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50.Carl Winslow(from Family Matters):  3,2,1.  1,2,3.  What the heck, is bothering me?

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Hall of Fame of Life compiled by Daniel Auger, Paul Gulyas, Steve Polaski, Jay Juran, Justin Buturla, Jon Bouchard, Chris Cesario, Dick Jones, Kevin McCarthy, Mike Grey